Yeah I'd probably just hire my cousin and hope for the best, which is a terrible plan.

Shiny side down" - I've been doing that for years with frozen pizzas.

Yeah @davis.emma you're right about checking under there, but most people forget about the dishwasher drain hose too. My buddy had a weird gurgling noise in his sink for like 2 weeks and it ended up being a piece of plastic wrap blocking the hose connection point where it ties into the garbage disposal. You gotta unscrew that clamp and pull the hose off to really see if anything's stuck in there. Also check if the disposal drain plug was knocked out when they installed it, that one got me last year.

Oh man, I feel your pain! Had a similar thing happen where I was debugging a login flow for like 4 hours and it was just a single missing closing bracket in an if statement.

Bro I swapped to Wix and it was WAY quieter too.